0:00
What is life but a series of inspired follies
0:04
The difficulty is to find them to do. Never lose a chance. It doesn't come every day
0:10
I shall make a duchess of this dragon-tailed guttersnipe. Yes! In six months, in three, if she has a good ear and a quick tongue
0:19
I'll take her anywhere and pass her off as anything. We'll start today. Now, this moment
0:23
Take her away and clean her, Mrs. Pearce. Monkey brand, if it won't come off any other way
0:28
Is there a good fire in the kitchen? Yes, of course. Let's take all her clothes off and burn them
0:33
Ring up whitely as somebody for new ones. Wrap her up in brown paper till they come
0:38
You know, gentlemen, you're not. Talk of such things. I'm a good girl, I am, and I know what the latter you are
0:45
We want none of your listen-grove prudery here, young woman. You've got to learn to behave like a Duchess
0:50
Take her away, Mrs Pierce. If she gives you any trouble, swallow her. No
0:54
Mr. Eliza, you are to live here for the next six months learning how to speak beautifully like a lady in a florist shop
1:00
If you're good and do whatever you're told, you shall sleep in a proper bedroom and have lots to eat and money to buy chocolates and take rides in taxis
1:10
If you're naughty and idle, you will sleep in the back kitchen among the black beetles and be walloped by Mrs. Pierce with a broomstick
1:16
At the end of six months you shall go to Buckingham Palace in a carriage, beautifully dressed
1:24
If the king finds out you not a lady you be taken by the police to the Tower of London where your head will be cut off as a warning to other presumptuous flower girls Now if you not found out you
1:37
shall have a present of seven and sixpence to start life with as a lady in a shop. If you refuse
1:42
this offer you will be a most ungrateful and wicked girl and the angels will weep for you
1:48
Will it rain, do you think? The shallow depression in the west of these islands is likely to move slowly in an easterly
2:05
direction. There are no indications of any great change in the barometrical situation
2:18
Oh awfully funny. What is wrong with that, young man? I bet I got it right
2:28
Killing. I'm sure I hope it won't turn cold. There's so much influenza about it
2:36
It runs right through our whole family regularly every spring. My aunt died of influenza
2:45
So they said. Oh dear. But it is my belief they've done the old woman each
